Why Belief in Others Changes Everything
“I don’t understand. You’re already fluent in English. Why are you helping us?”
A new member of our LEAN Toastmasters Club in Beijing asked me. Her tone wasn’t rude—just genuinely curious. In her eyes, my choice to give feedback, coach others, and stay after meetings wasn’t expected.
That moment stuck with me.
Because back home in the Philippines, helping each other grow is the norm. You challenge each other, stretch each other, encourage each other—because someone did that for you.
As one of my mentors often says:
“Magaling na, pero may igagaling pa.”
(You may already be good, but there’s always room to grow.)
That mindset shaped me.
It still does.
Sometimes, we grow not because we believe we can — but because someone else does.
When Someone Believes in You First
In 2022, I finally said yes to Toastmasters after seven years of quietly holding back. I was shy. Scared. I didn’t see much in myself as a speaker or a leader.
But my mentors did.
Every time I was recognized—Best Speaker, Best Evaluator—it didn’t feel like my win. It felt like a shared moment with the people who had been investing in me all along.
They saw something I couldn’t yet see.
And that belief… became my foundation.
That’s what the Pygmalion Effect is. It’s when someone expects great things from you—not out of pressure, but out of belief—and you begin to live up to those expectations.
You start rising because someone expects you to rise.
How I Learned the Name for What Was Happening
I first encountered the term “Pygmalion Effect” when I was competing for the first time and had reached the District level for the International Speech Competition.
I came across a speech by Arabella Bengson, Toastmasters World Champion of Public Speaking in 1986. Her speech was titled: “We Can Be Pygmalion”
📺 Watch it here.
Listening to her message gave language to what I had already experienced.
In the process of competing, I didn’t just prepare a speech — I was being shaped by the belief of my mentors, peers, and fellow Toastmasters.
Their belief was the fuel that helped me rise.
Their expectations weren’t a burden — they were a gift.
The Ripple Effect in Beijing
Now that I’m here in Beijing, I understand more clearly why I keep giving. Why I mentor. Why I coach. Why I stay behind after meetings to listen.
Because I know what it feels like to be seen.
And I want others to feel that, too.
At LEAN Toastmasters, I’ve seen the same belief that once lifted me start to ripple outward. Members step into roles they were unsure about—General Evaluator, Table Topics Master, Speaker—and they shine.
Not because they felt ready, but because someone told them, “I believe in you.”
That’s the power of collective growth—when your confidence isn’t built in isolation, but in community.
Real Insight: How to Practice the Pygmalion Effect (Without Overthinking It)
Here’s how I try to apply this belief-driven growth in real ways—nothing complicated, just consistent:
- Acknowledge effort, not just outcomes.
“That was your first time evaluating—and you handled it with heart. Let’s keep building on that.” - Speak into potential early.
Don’t wait until someone feels confident. Call it out now:
“You’ve got presence. Let’s get you on the speaking schedule.” - Model what was once modeled for you.
Think of how your mentors spoke to you. Repeat that cycle. - Let your presence be permission.
When others see you showing up, improving, and still learning—they feel safe to try, too.
Belief Is a Gift You Give and Grow
I didn’t become a stronger speaker just by joining Toastmasters. I grew because someone believed I could—and didn’t keep that belief to themselves.
Now, I’m paying that forward.
Not because I have it all figured out, but because I remember what it feels like to start from doubt.
If you see someone with quiet potential?
Say something.
Cheer them on.
Call them into something bigger.
Because that one moment of belief might be the reason they finally say yes.
Keep going,
Sheryl
P.S. For My Mentors
As John Maxwell wisely put it,
“One of the greatest values of mentors is the ability to see ahead what others cannot see and to help them navigate a course to their destination.”
To my mentors, DTM Betsie Krueger and DTM Jef Menguin — thank you from the bottom of my heart for being my Pygmalion Effect.
Your unwavering belief in me and my story has been the driving force behind this journey.
DTM Betsie, our crown diamond, showers appreciation and compliments in a world often filled with criticism. She sees the best in others, making them feel valued and special.
DTM Jef prioritizes authenticity and sincerity over grandiose words, always reminding me to focus on the connection, impact, and value we bring to every speech and story.
The beauty of Toastmasters lies in having mentors — and a tribe — who will celebrate with you, win or lose. 🥹
Because in the end, it’s not just about trophies. It’s about self-discovery and who you are becoming along the way.
Sometimes, all it takes is one person’s trust to push you beyond your limits.
I am so blessed. I got two.
The highest praise belongs to God for sending both of you my way. 🙏
I still have a long way to go… but as we say in Filipino:
“Malayo pa, pero malayo na.”
Thank you, my dear mentors, for helping me come this far — and for continuing to walk with me, as I keep going.
Reflection Prompt
Who believed in you before you believed in yourself?
And who needs your belief now?
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